OCD in Children: What Every Parent Should Know (and How to Help)

As a parent, you probably know your child better than anyone including their habits, quirks, and fears. So when something starts to feel different, it can be unsettling. Maybe your child is washing their hands more than usual, asking the same questions over and over, or getting stuck on certain thoughts or routines that seem hard to break.

If this sounds familiar, you might be wondering: Is this just a phase, or could it be something more?

Understanding Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) in children can be the first step in helping your child find relief. This post will help you recognize the signs, understand what’s happening beneath the surface, and know how to best support your child through it.

What Is OCD in Children?

OCD is a mental health condition that affects people of all ages including kids. It involves two main parts:

• Obsessions: intrusive, unwanted thoughts, images, or urges that cause distress.

• Compulsions: repetitive behaviors or mental rituals done to reduce that distress or prevent something bad from happening.

Children with OCD often know that their behaviors or worries “don’t make sense,” but they feel driven to do them anyway to relieve the intense anxiety that comes with the thoughts.

It’s not about wanting things “just right” or being a perfectionist, it’s about fear, doubt, and a brain stuck in overdrive.

What OCD Might Look Like in a Child

OCD can appear in many forms, and it often looks different in kids than in adults. Here are some common patterns:

Contamination OCD

• Excessive handwashing or showering

• Avoiding objects or people they think are “dirty”

• Repeatedly asking if something is “safe” or “clean”

Checking or Safety OCD

• Needing to check that doors, lights, or appliances are off

• Asking repeatedly if everyone is okay or if something bad will happen

• Struggling to sleep because of worry about safety

Harm or “Bad Thought” OCD

• Fear they might hurt someone, even though they don’t want to

• Confessing “bad thoughts” or apologizing constantly

• Avoiding sharp objects or people they love because of fear of harming them

Religious or Moral OCD (Scrupulosity)

• Excessive praying or confessing “sins”

• Fear of being a “bad person” or going to hell

• Asking repeated questions about right and wrong

“Just Right” or Symmetry OCD

• Needing things to feel “even” or done a certain number of times

• Arranging objects in precise ways

• Getting stuck if something doesn’t feel perfect

Children may also show less obvious compulsions, like mental reviewing, reassurance-seeking, or avoidance (“I can’t go to school because something bad might happen”).

When to Be Concerned

It’s normal for children to have routines, worries, or big feelings. But with OCD, these patterns become distressing, time-consuming, and interfere with daily life.

You might notice:

• Your child’s routines take hours.

• They’re frequently late or miss activities because of rituals.

• School performance drops due to distraction or avoidance.

• They seem “stuck” on certain fears despite reassurance.

• Their anxiety affects family dynamics or relationships.

If these behaviors are consuming large parts of your child’s day, or causing intense distress, it’s time to reach out for professional help.

Why Kids Don’t “Grow Out” of OCD

It’s common for parents to hope that a child will simply “grow out” of their fears. Unfortunately, OCD doesn’t usually fade on its own.

Avoidance, reassurance, and rituals may give short-term comfort but reinforce the disorder in the long term. Without treatment, symptoms can grow stronger and more rigid over time.

The earlier OCD is recognized and treated, the better the outcome.

How OCD Is Treated

The gold-standard treatment for OCD in both adults and children is Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP).

What ERP Looks Like

• Exposure: your child gently faces the things that trigger anxiety (like touching something “dirty” or thinking a scary thought).

• Response Prevention: they learn to resist the compulsion (like washing hands or asking for reassurance).

Over time, their brain learns that anxiety naturally rises and falls—and that they don’t need rituals to feel safe.

For children, therapy often includes family involvement. Parents are taught how to respond differently to OCD behaviors so they stop accidentally reinforcing the cycle (known as co-compulsing).

What Parents Can Do Right Now

Even before a formal diagnosis, there are steps you can take to help your child:

1. Stay Curious, Not Critical

If your child shares a fear that sounds irrational, resist the urge to correct it right away. Instead of “That doesn’t make sense,” try “That sounds really scary for you.” This builds trust and helps your child feel safe to open up.

2. Avoid Reassurance Loops

It’s instinctive to soothe your child by saying, “Of course nothing bad will happen!”—but reassurance feeds the OCD cycle. Instead, say something like:

• “I know this thought feels really strong, but we’re going to practice sitting with it.”

• “I believe in your ability to handle this feeling.”

3. Don’t Join the Compulsion

If your child asks you to check, clean, or repeat something with them, gently explain that helping with rituals will make OCD stronger. You can say:

• “I know you’re anxious, and I love you too much to help your OCD grow.”

• “Let’s see if you can practice this skill we talked about in therapy.”

4. Model Calmness and Flexibility

Children often mirror how adults respond to uncertainty. If you model patience, curiosity, and calm breathing, even when you feel anxious, you teach emotional regulation by example.

5. Seek a Trained OCD Therapist

Not all therapy is created equal. Traditional talk therapy or reassurance-based approaches can actually worsen OCD. Look for a therapist trained in ERP or CBT for OCD who has experience working with children.

If you’re in Utah, The OCD Relief Clinic provides specialized, evidence-based treatment for children and families, including parent support through the SPACE program (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions). This intervention can be effective even if the child is not in therapy themselves.

A Therapist’s Perspective

As a therapist, I often meet parents who feel exhausted and guilty. They’ve tried everything to help their child by comforting, fixing, and reasoning but nothing works long-term.

When we finally name what’s happening—OCD—it’s often a moment of both sadness and relief. Sadness for the struggle their child has faced, but relief that there’s a name, a plan, and a path forward.

OCD is not your fault, and it’s not your child’s fault. It’s a brain-based disorder that responds beautifully to the right kind of treatment. With early intervention and compassionate support, children with OCD can thrive.

Final Thoughts

If you suspect your child might have OCD, you’re already doing something brave by seeking to understand it. Awareness is the first step toward healing.

OCD can make children feel trapped, but the right treatment, especially ERP, can help them reclaim their joy, flexibility, and confidence. And as a parent, your role is powerful: not to fix the fear, but to walk beside your child as they learn to face it.

At The OCD Relief Clinic, we specialize in helping children and families navigate OCD with compassion and evidence-based care. You don’t have to figure this out alone—we’re here to help your child find freedom again.

📍 Located in Ogden, Utah | Serving Weber, Davis, and surrounding counties